Bring back the biff

The Hon Paul J Keating has a way with words. I heard him pipe up about something the other day and I thought it might be nice to reflect on some of his more memorable quotes. Irrespective of your political inclination I hope you enjoy following outbursts.

From this day onwards, Howard will wear his leadership like a crown of thorns, and in the parliament I'll do everything to crucify him.- On John Howard

But I will never get to the stage of wanting to lead the nation standing in front of the mirror each morning clipping the eyebrows here and clipping the eyebrows there with Janette and the kids: It's like 'Spot the eyebrows' - On John Howard

I am not like the Leader of the Opposition. I did not slither out of the Cabinet room like a mangy maggot - On John Howard

Come in, sucker- To John Howard

He's wound up like a thousand day clock. - On John Howard

He is the greatest job and investment destroyer since the bubonic plague.- On John Howard

He has more hide than a team of elephants.- On John Howard

I do not want to hear any mealy-mouthed talk from the Member for Benelong.- On John Howard

This is the sort of little-boy, stamp your foot stuff which comes from a financial yuppie when you shoe him into parliament. - On John Hewson

Like being flogged with a warm lettuce. - On John Hewson

I was implying that the Honorable Member for Wentworth was like a lizard on a rock - alive, but looking dead. - On John Hewson

I'd put him in the same class as the rest of them: mediocrity. - On John Hewson

I suppose that the Honourable Gentleman's hair, like his intellect, will recede into the darkness.- On Andrew Peacock

if this gutless spiv, and I refer to him as a gutless spiv - On Andrew Peacock

The Leader of the Opposition is more to be pitied than despised, the poor old thing. The Liberal Party ought to put him down like a faithful dog because he is of no use to it and of no use to the nation.- On Andrew Peacock

We're not interested in the views of painted, perfumed gigolos.- On Andrew Peacock

It is the first time the Honourable Gentleman has got out from under the sunlamp.- On Andrew Peacock

What we have as a leader of the National Party is a political carcass with a coat and tie on. - On Ian Sinclair

THE OPPOSITION

The Leader of the Opposition hurls all sorts of abuse at me, and all through question time those pansies over there want retractions of the things we’ve said about them. They are a bunch of nobodies going nowhere.

Where you all come aguster is, over here we think we're born to rule you. And let me tell you this, it's been ingrained in me from childhood, I think my mission in life is to run you.

You were heard in silence, so some of you SCUMBAGS on the front bench should wait a minute until you hear the responses from me.

they insist on being mugs, Mr Speaker, absolute mugs.

I'm not running a seminar for dullards on the other side.

Those opposite could not operate a tart shop

Shut up for a moment. If you ask questions and want to hear answers, shut up.

We will be rejecting the opportunist claptrap coming from the Opposition.

RANDOM QUOTES

You had an important place in Australian society on the ABC and you gave it up to be a pop star with a big cheque and now you're on to this sort of stuff. That shows what a 24 carat pissant you are, Richard, that's for sure. - To Richard Carleton

That you Jim? Paul Keating here. Just because you swallowed a f***ing dictionary when you were about 15 doesn't give you the right to pour a bucket of s*** over the rest of us. - To Former Labour politician, Jim McClelland (on the phone)

get a job!- To a University student protesting about fees